Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Lj"s Journey Part#2

Waking up from my emergency c-section was something I'll never forget because; I remember thinking where is my baby. What is happening to him right now? Some of my family members were there and some of Big Johnny’s (Lj's dad) family members were there in my recovery room when I woke up. My oldest son, my two sisters and my mom was there. Big Johnny's sister and nephew were there as well.  I remember thinking as soon as this spinal wears off I’ve got to be with my baby. If I could have I would have slid on the floor to get to him. Lj's dad was there and I knew that he would not let anything bad happen to him, but to me there was nothing like me being in the room with my little one. After about an eternity it seems the spinal wore off and Lj's dad came and took me in a wheel chair to Sunshine Pod room 22 of Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital of Cleveland. If I can paint a picture for you this is what I saw. I saw my little baby in this clear incubator with this little pamper that was too big covering his little butt, no shirt or socks, lying on his back with this giant mask that seemed to cover his whole face. He had two IV's in him. One IV in his arm and one IV in his little bitty foot. His eyes was closed, he had blue, red and black cords that streamed to a machine on the wall. Which turned out to be a monitor that watched his vitals. There were loud beeps and flashing lights. Bells and a lot of nurses. He had no fat. It seemed like he was a skeleton with skin. He was pale and a little yellow and his cry sounded like a baby kitten. I remember thinking is this my fault. Did I do everything possible to keep him in? TO BE CONTINUED>>>>


  1. Thank you so much for posting your story and being part of the Fight for Preemies. I'll be back for the next installment.

  2. Your story takes me back in a flash to my own delivery of my darling daughter, at 26 weeks, 2lbs. She had all the same tubes, IV's, bells going off. It was overwhelming. The worst part was the feeling of guilt, wondering if anything I did could have kept her in longer.

    The answer is no, but it takes a long time to convince any mom of a preemie of that.

    Thanks for posting your story. That takes strength. Blessings to you and your little ray of sunshine. xo